Scottish Deep Thoughts

I am walking a bit like Frankenstein after my first "legs day" at the gym since MC Hammer was cool. I'll survive though.

Nothing much else happened today; quite a mundane day actually.

5 more days until hockey.

I'm bored. That is all.

I decided to drag my unfit, lazy ass to the gym to lift some weights before hockey starts in a week. I went Friday after school. It is now Monday and I am still paying the painful price. The gym is tiny but no one goes so I have it to myself. On Friday, the only people there were Chris (the Jani from school) and the manager. I tried not to over-exert myself, but the fact that i can't straighten my arms without writhing and screaming in pain tells me that I did. I'm gonna go back today, but just focus on legs.

I picked up my new skates on Saturday - so nice. They are so nice that when I got home, I stared at them for a solid hour (well, not really). I'm like a kid on Christmas Eve! I can't wait for this season to start.

Sunday was pretty relaxing. I didn't do a whole lot - read the paper, ate, went over to Mike's place and bitched about the world.

I'm thinking of sorting out my back garden, which is a jungle of overgrown weeds and plants. If it were cleaned up it would be quite cool. I thought that it might provide a cathartic release in hopes to reach some sort of Zen-like state of understanding and appreciation of the world. Just a thought.

If you purchase a car in the UK you must take it to a garage once a year for various tests to prove that it is roadworthy (similar to AirCare in Vancouver but more extensive). I took my car in today. It failed.

I wasn't anticipating that it would pass. After my trip to Aberdeen there was definitely something wrong with the exhaust. My wee compact Subaru Justy sounded like a big, fat Harley Davidson chopper! I called the garage and, fortunately, it only needs a bit of work done - some welding to the exhaust, a new tire and some new wiper blades. Nothing major. As long as I can get to hockey next weekend I'm a happy man.

I went to Aberdeen this weekend to get a few hockey things before the season starts in a couple of weeks. I had never been to Aberdeen so I was looking forward to seeing the city.

On the way, I picked up a few Lithuanian hitchhikers. Unfortunately, I had difficulty understanding their broken english in an east European accent. Thus, they became a couple pairs of ears to listen to my ramblings.

After driving around in a foreign city for an hour, I was able to find the shop. A city map would have been a wise purchase before I left home. Anyway, I bought a stick, a helmet and had intentions of getting my skates sharpened and repaired. It turns out that the skates were beyond repair. I agreed and was forced to buy a new pair. To be honest, I did need a new pair - my car still has remnants of "skate stink" from the journey. It is hard to say goodbye to my skates; they have been a part of so many of my glorious goals. Goodbye, old skates.

I was able to get down to Edinburgh to see some shows during the Fringe Festival before school started. This Festival is massive ( I think it is the largest in the world). Anyway, I met up with Melissa O'Byrne, who was on her way back to Canada from a couple of weeks of touring Scotland and Ireland. Good to see her and get the update on Surrey news.

We saw 3 shows during the day. the first was a Shakespeare adaptation - not bad. The second was horrible! We went to see a stand-up comedian. His show was entitled "Fat, Bald and Loud" and judging by the write-up seemed as though he would be funny. He wasn't. When a comedian claims "the wheel of stereotypes" as his big finale, you know that he gonna be crap. His act consisted of him spinning the wheel and speaking in the style of the stereotype it landed on. Who does jokes about Chinese people saying "more egg roll?" or a mentally-challenged person trying to hit on a girl??! I couldn't believe it. Again, I think back and I know what I should have said....

"Hey fatass, do you realize that imitating racial and social stereotypes doesn't make you a comedian? It makes you a racist and a biggot! Get off the stage and out of the 80's. Eddie Murphy may have done done that stuff twenty years ago, but that was then and this is now. And you, my fat, bald friend, are no Eddie Murphy. Get off the stage."The unfortunate part was that some people were actually laughing at this dated display of American ignorance (the comedian was American).

Oh well, the third show was good. It was a stage production of a Scottish novel I have read. More on the dramatic side, but very well done.

I am still alive. However, I have been going through a few withdrawal symptoms while the network gets fixed at school and I get home access. I should be updating regularly now. I aplogize for any inconvenience to my adoring and loyal fans.

Well, that was a long journey home but relatively harmless and uneventful.

Good riddance, Venice. I don't like you and have no need to see you again. I went to the tiny airport 5 hours early just so that I wouldn't have to see you anymore!

The flight to London was fine. After standing in the Customs line-up for a solid 30 minutes I found a nice, flat, cold, dark corner of the airport and got as good a sleep as I could. My flight from London to Inverness this morning was delayed an hour. Is 10 am too early for a beer?

I'm now back in the balmy climes of sunny Scotland (that's sarcasm). Unfortunately, it is cloudy and definitely not 35 degrees. The cabbie and I had a good conversation. I guess that happens when you don't talk to anyone at length for 24 hours.

I think I smell, but I am desensitized to my own "travel stink".

Has anyone heard of the number puzzle Sudoku? It's kind of like a number crossword - so addictive. I can barely count when it comes to math skills, yet I like this game. The Brits love it. Someone introduced it to me and now I'm a bit hooked.

Anyway, that's what I did today.

I don't think that I would be pleasant company for anyone at the moment. I am in an internet cafe escaping the deluge of rain that has been falling all day. I guess I deserve at least one day of rain on my holidays. The dismal weather has reinforced my hatred of umbrellas and walking in the rain in flip-flops.

I have been on a bus for 14 of the past 24 hours. The overnight bus was horrible. I was stuck beside some fat, smelly guy who had NO bus etiquette whatsoever.

Inner monologue: "hey buddy, it's not a lazy-z-boy recliner. It's an uncomfortable bus seat so stick to your side and give me some space. Your leg is clearly under the seat in front of me. Who the hell do you think you are? And by the way, your elbow is not digging into an armrest. Yes, that's right, it's my ribs."

He had the window seat, too! Bastard.

As a consequence of the prolonged bus riding (and the smelly bastard not giving me enough space), my ankles are swollen. I have what doctors and other medical practioners call "CANKLES". It's a fairly common afflication when your ankles are so swollen or fat that it is impossible to tell where your ankles end and your calves start. I hope that I don't have "Deep Vein Thrombosis". It happens when you sit down for a long period of time. I think it only happens in planes though, so chances are probably good that I'm not gonna die from a massive stroke. My dad keeps telling me about this DVT crap so now I'm paranoid.

1. Pigeons - dirty, malicious and they shit on you!

2. Umbrellas - This is how eyes get poked out!

3. Venice - My second visit and I am lost...again.

My last night in Dubrovnik was pretty good. I went out with Steve (Vancouver guy) and his girlfriend Nikki. We had a few drinks in a couple decent places in the Old Town. Everything was good until a pigeon shit on me! Steve said it was good luck. I say it is another shirt that desperately needs washing.

This morning, the owner of the place I was staying at gave me a ride to the bus station on his scooter. It was very nice of him but a bit dodgy with my pack precariously balanced between his legs.

I caught the bus from Dubrovnik to Split. I catch an overnight bus to Venice in a few hours. Instead of relaxing on a beach and swimming in cool waters I get sweaty busses and airports for the next 24 hours. yippee.

Today was the last day in Dubrovnik and the last day of relaxation. I booked my flight from Venice to London for Wed Aug. 3.

I went over to Lokrum island today. It's a national park and has some really cool stuff on it. I spent most of the day laying on the rocks and swimming though. Such a good day.

Unfortunately, tomorrow I will be taking the bus back up north and will be in London around midnight on the 3rd. Then I will probably catch a flight from London to Inverness and be back home in Scotland late afternoon on the 4th. Not looking forward to this. It's gonna be a bitch.